Style, or lack thereof

I used to be stylish. I had cute clothes that fit well, cute shoes, and accessories. I think I still HAVE most of those things...but most days I feel I just look kind of "blah".

I don't want "blah," I want sophisticated with a little bit of edge. For my clothes, for my house, even for my accessories!

I think a lack of time, money, and definitely a lack of prioritizing have made me slowly become "blah."

I'd like to start wearing more skirts--my legs are the one thing that I actually like about myself. I'd also like these shoes. Dear lord, would I love those shoes...

Here they are on the lovely CJane. Aren't they AWESOME??

Result of My Upbringing

As the youngest, I despise feeling left out. I'm not sure why this trait manifested itself so strongly, but it did.

Unfortunately for the last year and a half, I've felt left out of my own life. That's the best way I can describe it. I STILL feel like I'm waiting for the best part of my life--the part in which I don't have school, I get to enjoy time with Caleb, I get to have a clean house and occasionally add to its decor...to cook at will, even deciding on a whim to attempt a long elaborate recipe on a weekday--without having to worry about how it will affect my homework time.

I know I chose this, but damn, sometimes it sucks.

Come December, I will be hosting a PARTAY to end all parties. Start planning your cute outfits now!

Also, I'm thinking about having a "shopping party" sometime in the near future...where I invite a bunch of women over, we all go through our closets beforehand and bring decent clothing that we either can't or don't wear anymore, and shop through each other's piles...do you think it would work better with many or few? I think many, just because most of my friends and I are so different in sizes. But then it might get chaotic. Share your thoughts, I'm interested to know if any of you have done something like this, and logistically how it might work.

Exclamation Point

The beach house fund now has $150.00 in it!

Beach and Cars

I want to live at the beach someday. Husband and I decided that this is not just a pipe dream and that we are going to try with everything we have to live at the beach within ten years(we were discussing it at Amelia Island this weekend).

So I opened another savings account that will be called Beach House Fund. When husband gets a job after finishing school, we need to save $2500+ per month in order to move to the beach within ten years. Hopefully as the years go by we can save more than that because my income should increase at least a little.

However. I also want:
-Sway bars
-An exhaust system
-A short-throw shifter
-Eventually, new wheels
-etc....

So I have to decide if my car is going to be the main splurge in my life between now and then, or if I even have the money for that--all of it will have to go for the beach house for a while. I also have to decide if that takes precedence over other things that I like spending money on (home decorating, food, clothes). Of course, this is all with the understanding that I will do none of these things until I/we pay off consumer debt and fund a 6-month emergency fund and max out retirement savings. However, if large groups of my adoring friends and fans want to get together and buy me stuff that I want but won't buy for myself, you can start with these:

-front sway bar

-rear sway bar

My birthday is September 30. No autographs, but you can come watch me at autocross anytime!

I crack myself up.

Anyway, I apparently have some serious thinking to do about my priorities for money, and where my car fits into that relative to other things. Autocross (and fun cars in general) can either be a cheap hobby or a really, really expensive hobby. I have to decide if the fun is worth the payoff. I think for the swaybars and short shifter, eventually, it will be. Not sure about the other stuff.

I think it is a matter of stress relief, for me. Autocross is GREAT for stress relief...but it is very short term, whereas LIVING AT THE BEACH would be great stress relief ALL THE TIME. I need to balance my short term stress relief needs with the eventual long term stress relief of the beach. But I don't think I'll ever give up Autocross. I love it too much.

Hey, if any of you women ever want to learn how to work on your car, let me know! I'm decent at it, and love it, and would love to show you/teach you.

And finally, here's a tidbit from the Concours d'Elegance from this weekend. I love this little car, and would like to at least drive it someday.

Safe to Dream

I think, now that the light at the end of the school tunnel is finally visible, my "dreaming" mode has kicked into gear.

I want to learn calligraphy and drawing. If there are no summer classes offered, I will take a calligraphy class, and maybe a drawing class too.

I want to clean and decorate my house. This will be a continual balancing act between not spending much money, but making my space the way I want it.

I want to cook something most days. I have TONS of recipes waiting that I want to try. (Pioneer Woman's recipes so far have all been foolproof and DELICIOUS).

I want to walk for exercise most days, and have time to hang out in the village that I moved to be near and love so much but don't get to see much of lately.

I think I have to limit myself to just a few at a time though. But I absolutely cannot wait until my life is my own again. The feeling is delicious even now.

Life, Oh Life

I am almost done with this semester! Yay! Then only TWO MORE TO GO!

And I get profit share on Friday, which will go toward tuition and car insurance. (Won't cover all of them, but is a nice reprieve from paying for them lol). Sure beats having to use savings!

I cannot WAIT for school to be done this semester. It's so nice to be able to do whatever I want in the evenings...it makes me feel like cooking and cleaning and reading and stuff, unlike when I'm in school and I just come home and do homework and crash.

I also did a focus group for Focus Pointe Global (They pay for you to talk about your opinion! How perfect is that for me??) a couple weeks ago and got $100 for a 1.5 hour discussion. I have another one on Thursday that is going to net $75 for another 1.5 hour session. This freaking rocks. I've registered with a couple other focus group sites too, but so far haven't gotten to participate in anything yet.

I'm trying to think of ways to boost my income (other than asking for a raise...can't do that till April when the formal annual salary review happens)...so far all I've thought of is babysitting, dog walking, and making freezable meals for busy people to eat during the week. Haven't actually DONE anything about any of them though, because I feel so strapped for time right now. And most people want babysitters on weekends, which is the only time I have to spend with hubby (Seriously. THE ONLY TIME. I don't see him at all during the week, because he's in another town). If I did the meals thing, I'd have no idea how much to charge and what to put on the "menu". Just mulling stuff over right now.

Also, hubby and I discussed the future, and it has me all excited. (We both agree that after we've lived in the city for some years, we will move somewhere a bit more remote...like in the mountains somewhere). So I started daydreaming about the big (but not extravagantly so) mountain house we'll have, where our families will all (maybe?) come stay for thanksgiving or Christmas, and I'll drink coffee on the porch every morning and admire the scenery, and we'll hike and the blue ridge parkway will be RIGHT THERE for me to go drive on whenever I want, and we'll have a family centric life and I'll cook a lot and basically, it will rock. We will also have friends come visit for getaway weekends a few times a year--well, ok, I will....hubby may want to run screaming when he reads that sentence, but if he does he can go camp with the guys that weekend. And we'll have a garden and a fainting goat. Well, the fainting goat is a maybe, but we both think that'd be a great way to a) have goat cheese, b) not have to cut grass, and c) be entertained whenever the goat faints.

Um, also, I might want to teach high school math at whatever time we decided to move to the boonies. Amen.

Go to Sally's Blog!

She's giving away a framed picture of her own or her husband's!

They're all so beautiful. I had a hard time choosing one (you have to pick which one you want if you win), but I eventually chose Melrose Abbey, one of Dan's photos. See below:

Babies

The time is closer than it ever has been. Now I see cute kids and it's like a punch in the gut and the scene in front of me is replaced with me and my kid and my husband and I want it so much I could stop taking the pills RIGHT NOW.

But I will wait. Need to wait so we both can finish school and so we can at least have some amount of savings.

But oh, I crave a child with him. Right now.